Farmers Get a Grip

It was our chiropractor who first told us farmers to get a grip. One of us would mince along the ice, going out to feed the horses or bring in wood for the stove, tensing her muscles and getting her neck out of whack. The other farmer would stride out boldly on the ice, and then wham! fall right down, getting everything out of whack. Despite our differing temperaments and techniques, our chiropractor assured us that all we needed was to get a grip.

One day, a few winters ago, after mincing and falling yet again, we went looking. We found a pair of Vermont-made ice grippers, which pleased our buying-locally selves, and we invested in one pair, to see if we liked them. Well, we did like them, and we wore them all the time, taking turns going out on the icy paths around the farmyard.

Then, when we took walks together through the slippery fields, we had a dilemma, with only one pair of grippers. But did we really need another pair? Why, winter was practically over, and the budget is always a consideration. Couldn't we make do?

Thus the thrifty famers went for walks holding hands, with one farmer sporting a left-foot gripper, and the other a right-foot gripper, which made us fifty percent less prone to mincing or falling. Over the ensuing spring, summer, and fall, the budget committee had time to think it all over, and Yes! was the conclusion. We would buy another set of grippers. We happily reported this to our chiropractor, who heartily approved.

Now that we have had our Vermont grippers here in New Hampshire for a few winters, we decided to take them on a holiday, to Acadia Park in Maine. Originally, the holiday in Maine was intended to coincide with our 20th anniversary. Unfortunately, that fell in August, which coincides with high season in the garden. Could we afford to take a week off when the tomato plants were lush with fruit, not to mention the other vegetables flourishing all over the garden? Alas, we could not, we groaned, wondering why we ever decided to be vegetable farmers in the first place.

But then, just recently, our daughter wanted to visit College of the Atlantic, which is right next to Yes! Acadia Park in Maine! Allllll right! we said. What could be more fun than Maine mountains and ocean in January?

We stuffed our horses' mangers full of three days worth of hay, and filled our kitty's bowl. We rented the cheapest room we could find in our first AirBnB, and we got free meals through the college's dining hall, both of which fit nicely in a vegetable farmer's budget. We were off, and we were entirely blessed by the Maine spirits: we had two days of brisk but manageable winter weather, with virtually no snow and no wind, and even some sunshine. Of course, there was plenty of ice on the mountain path, but we had our grippers.

We got a grip, hiking for two lovely days, around Jordan Pond and up South Bubble Mountain, as well as climbing Cadillac Mountain, highest point along the North Atlantic seaboard. We climbed in the fog and frost and ice and deep stillness, and our spirits were refreshed. Of course, it was a bit of a letdown to come off the trail to a parking lot on the top of the mountain, as there is a seasonal paved road to the summit. Happily, there were no cars, and we didn't see a soul on either hike, which is another advantage of hiking mountains in Maine in January.

There, on the top of Cadillac, as the fog lifted briefly for a view to the south of islands and ocean, my fellow farmer said, “So, are you happy that you married me?”

“What?” I was confused, blissed out by the physically demanding and spiritually uplifting hike.

“Isn't this supposed to be for our anniversary?” he asked.

“Oh, yeah,” I said, laughing, and gave him a kiss. “Actually, I thought being married to you would be more like this.”

“What do you mean?”

“Oh, you know, more hiking, and less farming . . .”

Now we were both laughing. “Aww,” my fellow said, “what are we going to do about that?”

Well, come to think of it, this is the year 2020, and we have been married twenty years, and we could take 20 hikes in 2020. That would surely give us a grip, a darned good grip, all year long, on farming and relationships, on work and love, on all those demanding, refreshing questions . . .

Originally published in the Monadnock Shopper News, Feb 12 - Feb 18, 2020

Fallow on the Farm

We farmers are not resolute in January. We are not full of firm determination, despite the New Year and resolutions and even the temptation of 2020. Why, Twenty in TwentyTwenty is almost irresistible: we could easily make 20 noble farming vows for the year.

Luckily, we have just enough resolve not to make twenty vows. Instead, we sit by the woodstove. We read books. Sometimes we re-read books. We knit. Sometimes we tear out our knitting mistakes, and re-knit. We listen to music, and then we listen to it again. We talk about making good, leisurely meals, and then we make good, leisurely meals, and then we talk about the good, leisurely meals we just made.  

We pore over seed catalogs, dreaming; we read poetry, also dreaming. We knock on doors, campaigning for a favored candidate; we pet the kitty, who campaigns for backrubs, warm houses, plenty of meals, veterinary care for all, and the occasional adventure of a mouse to catch.

My fellow farmer and I also visit the horses in the winter paddock, feeding them three times a day, and scratching their withers nearly as often. Then we visit the terrible tool area nearby, chock full of the growing season's panic of misplaced tools and busted irrigation parts and buckets full of half-finished projects. We visit, and then we decide to re-visit another day, when we feel more like tackling this project.  

“Tomorrow, probably,” I say. “We'll feel like it, and it'll be a little warmer, and it'll be a perfect day for it.”

“Yeah, probably,” nods my fellow farmer. “Tomorrow. That's a great idea.”

Of course, this is not a resolution, but merely a musing on the beauty of this time of year for New Hampshire vegetable farmers. Gee, we really can put it off until tomorrow, and all that junk will be right there waiting patiently for us, instead of being overrun by weeds or bolting or gasping for lack of water. It is the delightful lack of urgency in the winter months that gives a farmer the chance to rest up a little.

Granted, one of us will work substitute shifts in a local co-op to tide the budget over, and one of us will plug away at clearing and digging the greenhouse beds for the spring, and both of us will wrestle with taxes and machinery fixes and long-term farm plans.

But we will also enjoy a walk in our snow-covered fields, and enjoy our daughter, home from college. We'll be able to visit relatives and friends, and sort through piles of paper and put away laundry and spend more time writing, in this farmer's case. In fact, I could spend several good, leisurely hours just writing my monthly article, replacing 20 vows for 2020 with many restful non-vows.

After a pleasant morning in my writing room, I come downstairs. “How's it going?” my fellow farmer asks.

“Well, I wrote my column, more or less,” I answer. “It's not much to do with sustainable farming, and not very funny, either. It's about our lack of resolve this time of year, and how we put off things until tomorrow.”

“Nice!” says my fellow, who is reading on the couch.

“It's kind of done. But I was thinking maybe I could make it better and funnier.”

“Tomorrow, maybe?” says my fellow, and I laugh. This time of year might not be good for resolutions and vows and accomplishments, but it sure is good for appreciating a fallow time on the farm, as well as appreciating my fallow fellow farmer. He is very good at making most everything, including work and rest, better and funnier.

Originally published in the Monadnock Shopper News, Jan 15 - Jan 21, 2020

Farmers' Winter Torpor

Here on our New Hampshire vegetable farm, we get slower and slower as the weather gets colder and colder. Instead of farmers growing vegetables, it is farmers becoming vegetables.

In fact, on our very last farmers' market harvest, we were so slow we barely made it to the market. Granted, we had been dithering about whether we had enough produce to sell, and “Let's not go,” we moaned. “We're too tired.”

Unfortunately, the idea of not going pepped us up enough to remember just how much food we had left. We had some onions, and potatoes, some winter squash and carrots, some red and green peppers, a few tomatoes.

“We can eat all that this winter,” we bolstered ourselves.

“But what about all that cabbage?” we groaned in unison.

And what about all that lettuce and spinach and pac choi that has only just gotten big enough, staying alive with the help of propane heat in the greenhouse, just so we could take them to market?

We gave in, to the prodigious cabbage, to the budget-bashing propane. Not only did we give in, but we give in big: we would go to not one, but two farmers' markets, at the same time.

First there was the Stonewall Farm Fare, on both Friday night and Saturday, 9-3. Then there was the Walpole Farmers' Market, on Saturday, 9-1. We hustled and harvested, washed and bagged and bundled.

To our credit, we genuinely thought that the Friday night market started at five, so when my fellow drove in at 4:30, pleased to have plenty of time to set up, he was surprised to see the fare already open. The other farmers, minding their booths in the brisk outside air, assured him he hadn't missed much in the first half hour, and he enjoyed the outdoor fire, and the other vegetable (-like!) farmers' company.

On Saturday morning, we thought we had given ourselves plenty of time, rolling out of bed a few minutes before seven. Alas, readying for two markets is not the same as readying for one, which we might have realized if we weren't already falling into our winter torpor, or stupor, you might say.

We packed two vehicles, with matching crates and buckets of veggies, and I finally sent my fellow off to Walpole, at ten of nine, as it would take him longer to get to his market. I myself left after nine, and we both got to our respective markets right on time: i.e., half an hour late.

“Are you a vendor, or a shopper?” asked the friendly Stonewall parking person.

“I am a terribly late vendor,” I admitted, and the friendly person laughed and waved me on. I set up my table with the the help of the other farmers, who assured me I hadn't missed much in the first half hour, and then we enjoyed the fire and the company. Plus we all sold some vegetables, though not much cabbage, and some of our kale (just one tiny leaf) went to feed the Stonewall Farm bunny.

At around one, we farmers all felt limp, since normal market hours are nine to one, not nine to three. But we cheered ourselves with the thought of my fellow coming to join us from the Walpole market. Happily, he was just in time for me to go admire the craft vendors' wares inside the building, and to help all the farmers pack up their tables. Then we two drove home in our two vehicles.

“It's a good thing we weren't driving together,” I said, when we got home, “or we might have stopped for pizza.”

“Shucks!” said my fellow, who loves pizza. He had had water and a piece of cheese for lunch, and I had had peanut butter and carrots.

“We would have used up all our profits,” I said.

“People before profits!” answered my pizza-and-political-slogan loving fellow.

“Don't you mean pizza before profits?” I said. We both laughed a lot, in our limp, vegetable-like way, and threw together a fast and easy tomato soup.

I sighed happily, eating my soup. “Well, that's done for the year.”

“Well, I was thinking just one more. The Keene market, right before Christmas. Because we get one guest vendor slot in the winter market.”

“Wow,” I said. “Wow. I might have to lie down on the couch to think about that one.”

“You could lie down on a bag of cabbage instead, my vegetable friend,” my fellow suggested.

“Come join me,” I answered, and he did.

Originally published in the Monadnock Shopper News, Dec 18- Dec 24, 2019

Foolish and Annoying on the Farm

November on our New Hampshire vegetable farm means clearing out greenhouse beds, rolling up irrigation, storing crates and buckets, repairing tools, and, of course, celebrating. We did it again! We made it through another round of vegetables, and now we can both glory in the garden's goodness and revel that the season is over!

Ah, but wait: we still have to review the year and plan for next season. We need to do it right now, before the revels, and much, much before March or April, when we are giddy with warm weather and the fresh green of the world, and when we think we can do everything, twice over.

Yes, right now, when we are tired, and a little cranky, and the memories of the year have not yet faded into funny stories. All season we groaned to each other about everything annoying and foolish we did or didn't do this year, and with both farmers now hitting our fifties, we are considering our knees and our backs and our energies and next year's work more than ever.

We have to be realistic, we say firmly to one another, and plunge into the depths of foolish and annoying: why, for example, did we not get nearly as many potatoes as usual this year? Well, because we are planting more than we can look after.

“Let's plant less, and take care of them better,” my fellow suggests.

“I like that,” I say, writing it down. “So simple, yet so elegant.”

“We'll get just as many potatoes with less work, I bet,” says my fellow farmer. “Less work! More money!”

I laugh. “Don't you mean 'Less work! Better crops!' ”

“Yes! Less work! More money! Better crops! Write that down!”

I write it down, still laughing, and go on to our second question. Why was our eggplant crop so pathetic? Well, because the eggplant was to be planted in the old strawberry beds in the greenhouse, but the old strawberries were so prolific that we kept picking and picking, and didn't dig the plants up until much later than we planned, which meant the eggplant got in really late, after being in pots too long, and after the tomatoes in the nearby rows had gotten big enough to shade their small new neighbors.

“Let's not do that again,” I say.

“We won't need to dig up the new planting of strawberries for a couple years, anyway,” says my fellow.

“Let's figure out a plan before we have that crisis again, in a couple of years. I'd like to use our greenhouse space much more efficiently, anyway. I want to plant all the cutting greens inside, so that the weed pressure isn't so high, and the greens will be easier to harvest.”

“Maybe we could devote a whole greenhouse bed to greens. And then, with the strawbs, we can just plan on digging them up when they're done, and then put in a later-season crop, something for the fall istead.”

“Good, good,” I say, scribbling away. “Why didn't we think of this before?”

“Because we didn't have time to think!” says my fellow farmer. “What's next?'

“Well, dill and cilantro, which we knew were a problem right when we sowed them. We put in way too much and then of course they got totally overrun with weeds, which goes back to . . .”

“Less work! More money! Better crops!”

“But here's a different question: why were the cherry tomatoes so hard to pick this year?” “Because one of the posts broke, and the whole fence sagged over to the side of the greenhouse, and we didn't have room to pick easily.”

“We could put the cherry tomatoes in a bed closer to the center of the greenhouse,” I say.

“Or we could have fixed the post,” my fellow suggests.

I look askance at him. “I want bigger solutions,” I say, “more far-reaching ones.”

“Less work! More money! Better crops!” hollers my fellow farmer gleefully.

“But we don't need a better crop. We had a fantastic cherry tomato year.”

“We need more money and less work then!” says my fellow. “And we had great sweet red and green peppers, and onions, and a ton of winter squash. And lots of other good things. Nice, huh?”

“Yeah, but we're supposed to be focusing on the bad.”

“We are. We're going to fix it all! Ready? Ready?” I give in to my fellow's irrepressible good cheer, and we both holler it out: “Less work! More money! Better crops!”

Thus, our realistic review session dissolves into general end-of-season hilarity. Ah, November on the farm . . .

Originally published in the Monadnock Shopper News, Nov 20- Nov 27, 2019