We've been growing shiitake and oyster mushrooms on logs in our little patch of woods for the past seven years. I love mushrooms, which pair so well with all the vegetables we grow. My fellow farmer doesn't love mushrooms, but he does love new projects.
The first mushroom year, we bought the bolts, which are logs sawed into four foot lengths, from a local logger. That way we could efficiently use some of the oak and sugar maple limbs that were too small for lumber.
But we soon ran into trouble. For one thing, the bark needs to be intact on the logs, so that they don't dry out too quickly and the mushroom spawn can grow. It's hard when you're a logger using heavy equipment to protect the bark on the fiddly bits of wood for some crazy mushroom farmers.
Also the crazy mushroom farmers want bolts 6 inches or less in diameter, and the nice logger would have been hard-pressed to whip out his tape measure at every conceivable bolt. Thus we ended up with some of the bolts approaching 12-inch diameters.
This didn't seem like too big of a deal in year one. We didn't mind the weight of the 12-inchers much when we were in the inoculation and the year-long colonization period.
But in year two of mushroom production, when we actually started harvesting, we had second thoughts. We soak the bolts for 24 hours in a big tub of water, and a soaked four foot long 12-incher is a whole different story. It was too blasted heavy.
By year three, we started begging our nice logger for smaller bolts. By year four, we tried another nice local logger. The bolts she provided were nicely-sized. We were pleased. We slung those little soaked bolts around like nobody's business.
Alas, this logger's lumber crop consisted of mostly red maple, which we discovered was not nearly as productive or long-lasting as the oak and sugar maple.
My fellow came up with a great new plan. Now that we had a better idea of what we were doing, he would cut just the right size and types of trees in our own woods. This great new plan involved buying a great new electric chainsaw, which required extensive lobbying to the budget committee.
My fellow started out with high enthusiasm. His enthusiasm waned when he realized that his count of appropriate mushroom trees was not quite accurate. Plus it turns out that when you find a tree you think is perfect for mushroom logs, only a little bit of it is exactly the right size. Most of it is too small or too big.
Seems like it's a little harder to produce perfect bolts than we thought.
“We're going to soak these giant things?” I said with disbelief.
“No, no,” said my fellow, sighing. “We could use them for firewood.”
“But we don't have nearly enough bolts.”
“I know,” he said sadly, hugging his new quiet, exhaust-free chainsaw, which he loved, for comfort, and to keep it out of the budget committee's clutches.
Back to the drawing board, or rather the google research. My fellow presented his next great plan. This plan also involved the new chainsaw, since the more he used it, the less grumpy the budget committee would be.
“We can make totems,” my fellow said, “By cutting the big bolts into cross-sections, layering the mushroom spawn in between, and stacking up the sections. Isn't that great? Now we can use all our bolts, no matter what size. Plus we can use empty horse grain bags to keep the totems in for a year while the spawn does its work. That's efficient, right?”
“That's a good idea. The bags are kind of ugly to have in our pretty mushroom yard. But I guess nothing's perfect.”
“Yeah,” said my fellow. “Except for my new chainsaw.”
Originally published in the Monadnock Shopper News, June 24 - June 30, 2026